Journal Your Journey

I journal. I am a self confessed journal-er if there is such a word. I love to journal. It is very therapeutic, it is an excellent garbage can for frustrations, dream catcher, record keeper of achievements and memorable moments, and reminder of answered prayer. Most people think you have to journal everyday, every week, but to journal is an intimate exercise, and I have learned that there is no other method than to journal when your feelings are thoughts are the strongest.

I love to journal because no matter my reason it is definite evidence of God’s answered prayer, purpose and provision in my life.

Do you journal? If not why? If you do journal what about?

“Then the LORD answered me and said, “Record the vision And inscribe it on tablets, That the one who reads it may run”-  Habakkuk 2:2

Write down the thoughts of the moment. Those that come unsought for are commonly the most valuable.

Francis Bacon

Confession Is Good For The Soul

From time to time my mornings can be filled with confessions and emotions that I have allowed to escape me and lie dormant for fear that it will be uncomfortable and seem weak and depressing for me to share that the author of encouragement for everyday living gets discouraged but the simple fact is I need encouragement.

Encouragement

giving support, confidence, or hope to someone (oxford dictionary)

Yes i said it for all to see and read and know

My life is full of wonderful things family, friendship, faith however there are days that when I really sit with my restless self and quiet myself it is encouragement that I seek.

I seek to give hope so that I may in return feel hope, cheer confidently in order to build my confidence ( you know fake it to you make it), and give support hoping that it would be reciprocated.

My thoughts I share today isn’t merely a confession but a freeing and encouraging thought for me and others like me who read may read a blog, a book, or article on how to know that the Lord sees our intention to heal what is broken and our motivations for connecting with others and He wants us to know that  He can provide the right amount of encouragement, at the right time, for the right reason.

Romans 15:13- “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the Power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in Hope.” ESV

Finding myself If I can so can you

Psalms 139:16 ” Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” NIV

It has truly been a journey seeking my purpose in God. Frustration and disappointment would often set in as I tried to fit into my different roles in life. I tried to accomplish many things that I felt would make me feel purposeful, important, but in reality only exhausted me and confused my focus on what God was trying to teach me.

Things like who He is, His thoughts towards me, and His equipping of me to do His will.

My early 20’s I struggled with being a young single mother in the body of Christ. I felt so many conflicting feelings, and most importantly I felt like I had let my parents, myself and God down. One moment of rebellion in my eyes ended so many dreams. This life changing event could not of been in God’s plans. How could I ever accomplish my goals educationally? How could I travel? How could I support the baby? I even aimed my frustration toward the Lord. Lord how could you let me get pregnant? When so many other girls my age had been intimate with people for years.

I know the nerve of me but who else could I blame.

Yes I thought that, and if your honest you’ve had days like that. When your consequences for rebellion was exposed publicly. The same thought came to your mind.

I want to give you a thought. He knew, He cared and that is why He allowed the opportunity for correction.

Looking back Psalms 139:16 puts a smile on my face.

God knew I would rebel; He also provided teachable moments for me to learn from the experience. Motherhood was always His plan for me. I jumped ahead, but that never changed His thoughts toward me for a future and hope. Let me give you example of how God reveals that he doesn’t give up on His established plan for us.

My daughter and I were riding on the infamous parkway east in Pittsburgh approaching the lovely Squirrel Hill tunnels where traffic is always a gaurantee. I don’t remember where we were going this day, but I remember she was in the front passenger seat, and we were singing and sharing a rare moment of mother-daughter time when she turned to me and said ” mom thanks for keeping me”.

Thanks for keeping me just kept going through my mind.

Here my daughter was a child speaking encouraging words to me. The rebellious selfish 20 something young lady who thought she was too far away from God and had messed up too much for Him to ever care about my future. I knew that my daughter’s words came from God.

God used my daughter to remind me of Psalms 139:16 and Jeremiah 29:11. How great is His thoughts towards us.

Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the thoughts I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” NKJ

I confess it has taken me over 30 years in an around the presence of God to finally set aside my selfish ambitions and truly trust His promises that David, Isaiah, Paul and so many others recorded for me to read, recite and remember.

God is in the profession of establishing our purpose. God is in the business of establishing your purpose and mine before we were even a thought.

So have I figured out my purpose? Yes to seek his kingdom first and as I trust in Him; He will direct my path.

The fun part in walking in God’s established purpose for you is seeing how He’ll use you once you step out in faith.  That”s exciting!!!

God did answer questions for me even though I rebelled.

He wants to answer your questions also? What dream have you thought impossible? What support are you seeking that you haven’t received? Have a conversation with Him.

Memory Verses: Psalms 139:16 ” Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” NIV

Jeremiah 29:11 – ” For I know the thoughts I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” NKJ

Prayer: Dear Lord thank you for thinking of me and establishing a hope and future for me. Forgive me for doubting and rebelling when Your word says that You have established my days and promised a hope and a future for me. Amen.

Strength During Testing

 

It is so difficult to remember on our own sometimes just how faithful, and great God is as a Father. So I am thinking that is why we experience trials. Our trials reminds us, prepares us, and grows us closer to our father.

 

 A few years ago I shared about the experience of being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis on my original blog and I believe with it being Women’s history month sharing a powerful mind shift moment during a personal trial is a great way to start the celebration of the strength in discovered during one of my own trying time. I am sharing because we all too often won’t share our physical struggles in the early stages of diagnosis. Why?  I am not sure but I know it isn’t helpful to the people you love or you. So, today  I am sharing what I learned a little while ago.

When I was first diagnosed I was desperate for the diagnosis not to be true. I was a pretty healthy child, teen and young adult so to have such a major diagnosis given to you was paralyzing. There is nothing anyone can say to make you feel any better and it is hard for most people to understand the family of auto immune diseases because they are silent and invisible to those looking from the outside. No one could possibly know the storm occurring on the inside of your body. I am sure like most reading this the biggest challenge was that we have our lives despite possible impending disability. I was a mother of three children still needing me and my husband just coming out of the seven-year hump that married couples go through with small children. This was the most inconvenient time to have this happen but it did. It was happening. I cried some days and most I just went numb not really given any care or attention to the questions family members would ask. Then one day after a having a private pity party which I do from time to time I decided to turn to the one who always made me feel better and I prayed to my Father. I figured He made me so He would know how to fix me,

The answer I received wasn’t what I expected but it was what I needed to find my hope and faith to get me to today. I prayed and blew dust off  one of the many bibles in our home and opened up to the book of James Chapter 1

 

There were so many passages that stood out to me in the bible, but the book of James was the most appropriate for my need that day.

 

Stressing, Stretching and Strengthening in trials are all described in the first few verses of James chapter 1. James wanted to encourage the persecuted members of the body of Christ who had been scattered throughout the regions.

 

Like with the body of Christ in James day the text states what is necessary during trails and stressful situations in order to grow is faith, joy,patience and prayer. My thought immediately was how can I have Faith and Joy with an uncertain future? Why did this have to happen to me after 3 babies and a husband? Who can demonstrate patience while waiting on doctors to find a cure? Cried some more and the thought came to me Where is your Faith? Has God let you down before? Are you not alive? fully functioning? The Lord comforted me with the answer to my questions with this all four faith, joy, patience, and prayer are tools to assist in my maturation process in my relationship with the Lord and my witness to the world.

Ladies the same goes for you whether it is Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis, MS, Lyme’s Disease, Graves, Fertility issues, Cancers, Heart Disease, Stroke/Aneurysm, Diabetes, Mental Health whatever it maybe I can confidently say God would not have us lose hope.  The road is challenging and it is complicated but if we believe the promises of God we know this much that he works things out for the good of those who love the Lord Romans 8:28.